Sunday, April 15, 2012

It was a Dark and Stormy Night...

... The Pitter Patter of rain outside the small window, and the occasional crash of thunder are intermixed with the sound of soft breathing. It is a storage room, filled with people... Ex-People. Creatures that no longer think for themselves. That are incapable of thinking for themselves. The flash of lightning illuminates the room, revealing the blank empty faces sitting upon the cold stone floor. Tools, awaiting the chance to be wielded by their Master. My eyes were already open, staring into the darkness. I was unaware of myself for the longest time. I blinked once. Twice. Three times. And I remembered my final moments. The heat of the flames licking against my broken body. Amber Eyes glowing with amusement at the edge of the flames. The building I fell from becoming engulfed in the inferno. And then darkness. The darkness I awoke in. 

Six Months six days and six hours after the day that I died.

77 comments:

  1. What is this, a comic book?

    I kind of wait for the announcer to shout "WISE FWOM YOR GWAAAAAVE".

    So now that you're out of cold storage, are you going to pull an Austin Powers, and piss for thirty minutes? Or would you prefer spending the next week or so pretending to be the Governator and making Ice puns?

    I could keep this up all night. Give me a reason to care, dead man.

    ReplyDelete
  2. A comic book? No. No. This is a Horror Movie Sequel. The Killer Returned from the dead. The Final Girl of the Previous movie killed in the opening acts. And the promise of a Higher Body Count and more blood than the first. Higher Stakes too. As you will soon find out. The Killer is a fair bit more threatening this time around. As I hope to show you personally, my dear Sage.
    Hugs and Kisses. I've missed you SO much. Have you missed me?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Your old hit squad included a lady luchadore, a monster clown, and a Victorian-Era Hitman. You're either a Comic Book Villain, or a Shonen Manga Villain. Here's hint: you have a poor success rate either way.

    Hit me with your best shot, you wannabe Red Skull. Or Dio Brando. Take your pick.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well this is new. Some Reply feature for Bloggers comments? AWESOME.
      Oh... Sagey. Red Skull? You know I am The Joker to your Batman. Let's face it. You are Hardly Captain America, Mr. Dark and Troubled. Don't you understand Sagey? This is a new beginning. A Clean slate. My previous success or failure is irrelevant. I am a weapon, reforged, sharpened and strengthened beyond anything I could have hoped to do on my own.
      There will be no Demon to save you this time, for the Devil himself is at MY back. Once he says the word, your blood will paint the ground a beautiful crimson. Soon enough. Soon enough.
      ... But you HAVE missed me haven't you. You have not refuted it yet.

      Delete
    2. Elaine tried everything to give you something other than THIS. OF course I didn't miss you.

      You talk like Morningstar, but identities can be forged. We'll see if you're the real thing soon enough. I'm not worried until then.

      Delete
    3. HAHAHAHAHA. Did she? I don't remember. It'll come back soon enough. It's been months after all.
      I am the least of your worries anyway. Just a Specialized Rook. But who put me back on the board? That. Is what you should be concerned about Mr. Spirit Detective Wanna-be.

      Delete
    4. You don't remember.

      Interesting.

      Real men transcend the chessboard Morningstar, and move the pieces. I thought you'd have figured that out by now.

      I wonder what else you don't remember.

      Delete
    5. Not a Man, Sagey. A Weapon. In this Great Game however... We are all pieces on the board.

      Delete
    6. Good grief, you two bicker a lot. Just.. go get married or something. Oh, and for the love of fuck, can we please stop with the chess analogies? They're freaking EVERYWHERE now.

      Delete
    7. Blame Thage.
      The other part is up to Sagey.

      Delete
    8. You could always just shut up for once.

      Delete
    9. Yep. I could. But you know what? I WON'T.
      Ha. HAHAHAHAHA. Ha. Ha.

      Delete
    10. Indeed. Also. Who are you again?

      Delete
    11. Um... your own personal stalker? It doesn't really matter.

      Delete
    12. Yes it does. I need your first name, social security number and home address. Cell Phone number is optional.

      Delete
    13. Amy. 123-45-6789, home address of

      1234 Go Fuck Yourself,
      Fear Mythos, Scaryland.

      Delete
    14. Mmmmhmmm. How about Bank Account number? Clothes Size? And... Credit Card numbers.

      Delete
    15. 987654321 Bank account number, clothes size of none of your fucking business, and credit card numbers? Bitch, please. You think I actually have my name on anything that could be traced? You're dreaming.

      Delete
    16. Eh. Suit Yourself. No need to get Angry about it. Jeez. Just a simple question. Meant no harm by it. Also. How do you feel about Gasoline? And Dogs?

      Delete
    17. Gasoline means fire, and dogs mean bite marks. Why?

      Delete
    18. No. Gasoline + Dog = Hot Dog.
      Just curious.

      Delete
    19. I imagine it would taste horrible. I miss flaming baby baseball and all the cries of outrage over it. Your creative skills, they're slipping, aren't they? Go ahead and deny it. You're fresh from the grave, maybe a few maggots have been snacking on that brain of yours. We won't judge you for being subpar, not yet. ^.^

      Delete
    20. It really didn't take THAT much creativity. What do you want from me. Death by Flamingo Spear? Giant Robot?

      Delete
    21. Don't go stealing Coyote's shtick! And for fuck's sake, this isn't the Gundam verse...


      Try a little harder!~

      Delete
    22. Awwww, now you're going to pretend you're "above" trolling me? That's so sweet, cutie pie. Are you going to pretend you died on purpose now too?

      Delete
    23. Troll you? Nah. I am not above trolling you. Bombarding your house with custom Hot Dogs... Yes. I am above that. You are not worth it. The Banter is hollow. It has no soul. I am sorry dear but... It is not meant to be.

      Delete
    24. Oh, woe is me, our star-crossed hatred is not meant to last? Well, fuck, I'm going to have to find something constructive to do with my time. Do let me know when you find a fuck to give, won't you?

      Delete
    25. It might take me a while, sadly.
      I am sorry for breaking your heart my dear. Farewell

      Delete
  4. ...what? another one, oh christ save me

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    Replies
    1. The original, my friend... You are my friend right? Wait. Who are you? I have never seen YOU before.

      Delete
    2. You aren't the only one with Redlight woes. Poor Caden..

      Delete
  5. Hm.

    I do have one thing to say.

    This had better be - by some far-flung, slim chance sprung between Heaven and Hell - really you, Brother.

    Because if it is not...

    If this is an imposter.

    Someone's idea of a fun joke.

    Then I swear to our Father's name...

    I will hunt you down myself. Mark my words... if you are anyone but who you say you are, you will suffer for MONTHS for mocking my friend. Nothing would compare to the level of torment and agony I would put you through. One pitch at a time. Not Father. Not the Devil. Not anyone. You would only belong to me then...

    Well, Me, Chaos and Destruction.

    A fair warning.

    I will be Watching.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh what. Are you going to sick your Pigeons on me? Peck me to death? Bah.
      How about this to confirm my identity. I have a packet of birdseed waiting right here beside me.

      Delete
    2. Have faith, Brother. I can assure you that this is no trick. After all, did you expect us to allow for Mr. Cifer to be taken out of the game so easily? I'd suggest you start to think outside of the box, because the rules have changed more than you could ever imagine...


      Regards,

      Redlight

      Delete
    3. Oooooooh. Shhhhhh. You'll ruin the ending of my STOOOORY.

      Delete
    4. ...

      Of course you do.

      I was... unaware the Zombie Apocalypse had begun. I understood that was reserved for a certain day in December. I do hope the maggots aren't causing you trouble...

      How... is this even possible? You were dead. Everyone I contacted confirmed it...

      Delete
    5. You'll have to wait for the end of the story, like everyone else Screamer. Sorry.

      Delete
    6. Heheh. With Redlight involved, it's sure to be an excellent story...

      It's good to see you back, my Brother.

      Delete
    7. The story can be guessed. Screamer, baby, why are you so worried about the details? He's pretty much already given away how he began... let's just connect the dots.

      And maybe have him throw away that packet of birdseed.

      Delete
  6. Oh fun, another one back from the grave. I hope I have as many lives in reserve as some of you seem to, and of course the classics are always apreciated. You know last time I missed you by mere weeks, I hope you're up to your old standards.

    See you around
    -Caged

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. New Guy huh? A pleasure to meet you Cagey. I am sure we will have lots of fun together.
      Say. Do you like Babies?

      Delete
    2. As what, lunch dishes? I much prefer cows, personally. A more specific question nets you a clearer answer by the way. Still, fun sounds promising, I'm looking forward to it.

      See you around
      -Caged

      Delete
    3. Specific would ruin the surprise. But yes. Loads and LOADS of fun. For me. Probably.

      Delete
  7. Okay, pretty sure you melted. Are you the terminator now? Is that what's going on here?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sorry. Weren't YOU dead too?

      Delete
    2. I didn't die! What an overreaction. I just got shot and buried under a warehouse. No biggie.

      Delete
    3. And I got thrown off a building into an explosion. I walked it off.

      Delete
    4. Bad Ass Mother Fucker, you are not.

      Delete
    5. I don't see YOU coming back from the dead.

      Delete
    6. I'm not dumb enough to die in the first place, Twinkletwat.

      Delete
    7. At least I can come up with ORIGINAL insult names. Amykins.

      Delete
    8. But I prefer the classics! Besides, I like "Ames" better.

      I could just start calling you KnightShade, but your blogs manage to lampshade that all by themselves. All three of them.

      Delete
    9. I only wrote Hunter and this one. The Knight one was some other guy.

      Delete
    10. Passwords and gmails are so easy to get a hold of these days. I mean, jeez, if your rip-off could obtain them.. maybe even I could! I can only imagine the trolling I could accomplish under your name.. ;D

      Delete
    11. I am assuming my Rip-Off was GIVEN them. Valtiel probably.

      Delete
    12. Ugh, that's just unprofessional. So lazy.

      Delete
    13. Not my fault. Take it up with Management.
      Really.
      I Dare You.

      Delete
    14. A bunch of red tape. However, I'll make sure to mention it the next time I see tall and Faceless. I'm sure it'll go down ever so well.

      Delete
  8. So, you were just mostly dead, not all dead?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nope. I was Dead. Very, Very Dead. I shall explain later, gentle reader.

      Delete
    2. I have a feeling this is going to require patience.

      Goshdarnit.

      Delete
  9. Sempai?

    Is it really you? Are you really back, sempai?

    Yaaaaay!!! So sugoi!!!!! ^_^_^_^_^_^_^

    ReplyDelete
  10. Oh, this one too? Good thing Elaine died, or else we might get a retread of that tedious drama. I am getting a very definite vibe that a board has been flipped lately. It's exciting.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Huh, interesting turn of events. I can only hope your squad is formed back together. They were some of the finer members that have been in His service

    ReplyDelete
  12. I've debated for a while now how to respond to this particular turn of events... I've decided upon the following...


    "Hello."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OK. So. Blogger decided that your comment was Spam, and I apologize for taking so long to figure that out.
      In response to your response to this unforeseen and dramatic turn of events I believe the most appropriate response is...
      "Hi."

      Delete
  13. Good to finally have you back, your replacement was kind of a douche.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Heh...
    It was a dark and stormy night.
    The captain said to the Cabin Boy.
    "Tell us a story Jim."
    So Jim began;
    "It was a dark and stormy night,
    the captain said to the cabin boy,
    'tell us a story Jim'
    So Jim began..."

    You just keep repeating yourself.
    Do you not, Star?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I fucking love you for this, Ember. <3

      Delete
    2. A Good performance can be shown multiple times without it getting dull.
      This. Is a very, VERY good performance.

      Delete
    3. I suppose if you believe in it enough.
      Wish upon a (ignoring my pun) star
      and anything can happen!

      Either way.
      You seem like an interesting sort.
      Try not to get killed this time.

      Also it seems I do not know what this "reply" key does.
      Apologies.

      Delete
  15. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  16. Oh dear. YWWOH will not be happy. No no no.

    ReplyDelete